Who are you?

But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them--yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.

- 1 Corinthians 15:10

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Being self aware is crucial when dealing with life issues, relationship issues, work-related issues and personal issues.  A person who is self-aware can acknowledge, appreciate (and admit) when they have slipped into a [self-destructive] default mode, when they are acting out of character and/or if they are progressing/developing into a better person.

When you are self-aware, honesty in regards to self is high on your priority list as you are able to convict yourself for wrong-doing as oppose to waiting for condemnation.  Self awareness also challenges you to exercise empathy, unconditional love, faith and grace because by seeing the flaws/faults in yourself, you should be able to appreciate and accept the flaws/faults of others.

"For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you." - Romans 12:3

Self awareness should never be used as an opportunity for self-righteousness or judgement of others but rather a challenge for change and judgement of self because we are meant to control ourselves, not others.  Therefore, self awareness gives us the power to implement self control as our awareness brings wisdom and insight to self.  Whether we achieve 'perfection' in our thoughts, personality, relationships and self is not the point.  The point is to work towards the unattainable goal of perfection as it is a reflection of God's love, love of others and love for self.

To be self aware also means that you are able to self reflect.  To self reflect means to question, change or embrace people's perception of you, God's perception of you and/or their own self perception (ie. why do I choose to do the things I do? why does my opinion differ from the opinions from the opinions of others? why do I feel the way I feel about him/her/that situation etc?).  If someone is not able (or willing) to self reflect, that ultimately means that they will not be able to see their true self as God intended, their true self as people genuinely see them or the person they have constructed for others to see.

This is dangerous because one can not reach their full potential in Christ or live life abundantly if they are unaware of who they are, who they are meant to be or who that have become on this earth.  It would be living a lie without reaping the 'benefits' of your deception.  So what is the purpose?  

Self reflect.  Don't be afraid of what you see.  You are already accepted in the Beloved.  God knows all and sees all.  So, if you self reflect and become self aware, the only one [who really matters] that you are lying to is you.

Be Blessed IN FINDING, EMBRACING AND APPRECIATING THE TRUE YOU

God is Love. Love is Life. Life is in The Word.

Get out of your own head

 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

- Galatians 5:22-23

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This is the problem with free will.  God blessed us with the ability to make choices, think our own thoughts and act in the manner we choose to act.  It's a catch 22 when you think about it.  Because, we are innately born into sin.  It's in our DNA, thanks to Adam.  Therefore, it is for us to choose to act against our nature - to choose to do good.  Worse still, when we KNOW what needs to be done to be good... but everything in us tells us to do otherwise.

It's all in your head - the mind.  That's why the Word tells you to "not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind" (Romans 12:2a).  Because if you don't start there, all the thoughts, the memories, the opinions and the perspectives of yourself and others will steer you the wrong way.  If your mind is not renewed to line up with the Word, it will always steer you wrong.

And I will be the first to say that at this very moment, I am struggling with this very thing - getting out of my own head.  I know what I need to do, i know what I need to think, I know what I should be ignoring... but my mind is in overdrive right now and fighting the spirit (and fighting dirty, I might add) to get what IT wants.  But, I know (as I continue to climb this slippery slope in rebellion) that I am running further and further away from God's will and EVERYTHING I have worked so hard to accomplish.  So who wins?

In regards to myself, I wish I had the correct answer for you at this point.  But I don't.  I'm stubborn and, internally, I'm scraping right now.  But for anyone reading this (think of me as a hypocrite if you want) I encourage you to smother your soul and release your spirit to do God's will.  Give into conviction and do what you know is right.  God knows the end and He knows what's best.  Fighting Him will only keep you stuck, stagnant and a LONG way from your destiny.

I love writing.  I write because it is my release.  It is where I can be real, say what I want... and I don't HAVE to listen to any rebuttals or back-chat LOL  Sounds a bit controlling, I know, but truth be told, I have a lot to say and I know it is wisdom straight from my heavenly father.  And because my delivery is still raw and in the process of being refined, writing usually gets the job done right.  Understand that everything I write is for me as much it is for you because writing gives me a chance to hear what God has to say to me as well.

Get out of your head.  Stop letting your past, your hurts, your observations, your generational cycles, your disappointments, your betrayals, crisis and circumstances keep you from all that God has for you.  The Word says: "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10).  Christ died with all the trash we carry around on a daily basis, so why do we keep picking it back up?  

The choice is mine and yours... live angry, bitter, mediocre, judgmental  depressed, without purpose and for nothing more than to die.  OR we can "have life and have it more abundantly", living it to the fullest, following Christ, as hard as it may be at times, knowing that you will arise.  

I know what I need to do... hopefully I start making better choices sooner than later... and hopefully you will do the same :)

Be Blessed IN LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST

God is Love. Love is Life. Life is in The Word.

Clouds

Dear friend, guard Clear Thinking and Common Sense with your life; don't for a minute lose sight of them.  They'll keep your soul alive and well, they'll keep you fit and attractive. You'll travel safely, you'll neither tire nor trip. You'll take afternoon naps without a worry, you'll enjoy a good night's sleep.

No need to panic over alarms or surprises, or predictions that doomsday's just around the corner, Because God will be right there with you; he'll keep you safe and sound.

Proverbs 3:21-26 (The Message)

I used to smoke weed. Correction: I used to smoke A LOT of weed. And I’ve come to the conclusion that I enjoyed smoking weed because it helped me to escape my reality. It helped to fog my brain and cloud my vision. When I was high, nothing mattered. I had my head in the clouds, literally. And there was a few periods in my life that I was high QUITE often. I was high in class, I needed to be high to fall asleep, I went to work high a few times, I even went to church high a couple times. (Thank God for His mercy). At the time, I really didn't know what my problem was, I just enjoyed getting high because then I wouldn't have to think or deal with anything else going on around me.

So, why am I telling you this? I'm telling you this because we often use 'clouds' to escape our reality and keep us stuck. And for those of you who have never smoked weed, never been high and are thinking 'this girl must be crazy' please understand that 'clouds' can be anything you use to distract yourself from your reality, Such as, your job, sex, your partner, your children, religion, failed hopes and dreams, alcohol, shopping, illness and pets, just to name a few. 

'Clouds' are something we use on an abnormal basis to cope with the chaos in our lives. Some of you might be thinking 'well what's wrong with my children, or my partner, or religion being my 'cloud'’? And my answer is this: there is nothing wrong with doing most things in moderation. A glass of wine once a week doesn't make you an alcoholic  and it doesn’t mean you need alcohol to cope. Similarly, taking prescription medication to help balance mental instability (as prescribed) isn't wrong either unless you’re abusing it or prescribing your own ‘medication’ to cope, such as weed, which would be classified as forming clouds. This applies to all coping mechanism that are used out of balance with reality. In other words, if your 'cloud' controls the better part of your life and time and keeps you in a place of stagnation, you’re going to have to make some decisions about where you want your head to be: in the 'clouds' or above them.

Let’s talk some more about religion, partners and children... How could those things be classified as 'clouds'?  In innocence, we can use safe distractions to cloud our vision without even realizing that we are in fact causing damage. Because no one could condemn you for being religious or charge you for being overly caring of your children. But even positive intentions turn into crutches and excuses for not experiencing life to its fullest. I'm not saying to lose religion or start neglecting your children. What I am saying is don't use your religion as an excuse to not relate to people or life 'normally and/or logically' or don't use your children as an excuse to keep you from making purposeful steps in life when in fact it’s fear holding you back OR don't let your partner, father of your children or ex keep you in the 'clouds' to the point that you lose yourself and almost feel like you can't advance in life without them. Co-dependency will keep you stagnant if you allow it to.

In conclusion, I don't smoke weed anymore.  Although, there are times that escaping from reality sounds great when I have four kids running around me. Thankfully, I've gotten to the point that I'm above my 'clouds' and I'm reaching for heaven. Functioning on auto-pilot, even airplanes know that flying above the clouds is the best place to be. The air is clear up there. And when you can see clearly, you will see God and His goodness for you.

Be Blessed in RISING ABOVE YOUR CLOUDS

Counsel and sound judgment are mine; I have understanding and power - Proverbs 8:14 NIV

They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. - Ephesians 4:18 NIV

As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. - 1 Peter 1:14 NIV

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FOCUSED

2 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.  

3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 

6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

- Philippians 1:2-6

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A few months ago, I embarked on a journey that really put my faith to the test.  And as I settle into my new season, I see God's grace and kindness working wonders in my life as He blesses me with wisdom and opens doors for me to stroll through.  More than anything, I understand now what all of my exhaustion, tears and frustration has been about... He has led me to a time such as this.  

Over the past few months, whether you realize it or not, I have poured out my heart to all of you via e-mail as I felt inspired to reach out and put words to some of the frustrations that you all may have been feeling as well.  And I appreciated all of the feedback and blessings I received in return, although that was simply icing on the cake.  Through these e-mails, my desire was to encourage everyone to acknowledge their flaws, challenges and struggles in hope that by bringing them to the forefront, you can let them go and step into whatever new season God has for you.  Some of you may have got that, some of you may not.  Either way, I at least hoped for peace in realizing our struggles are a commonality instead of a differentiating factor among us.

For those of you who don't know, the e-mail "Walking on Water" (sent on February 3, 2012) marked my last day at my full-time, good paying job (with benefits)... because I quit.  I have a husband, four children, a mortgage and bills.  BUT I also have dreams and I have a vision.  And I knew I couldn't follow God's plan for my life trying to balance everything.  I was drowning and I knew something had to give.  I'm not telling everyone to go and quit their jobs, definitely not, because the last few months haven't been easy.  But by His grace, we have ridden out the storm and now I'm FOCUSED.  More than ever in my life.  And I know God NEVER would have brought me this far to leave me.

So what am I saying?  Firstly, I may be MIA (missing in action) for a while.  For those of you who look forward to getting these e-mails weekly, I apologize, but I have to live on purpose.  I will attempt to share my thoughts, challenges, successes and set-backs as the days go by but if you don't hear from me... know that I'm FOCUSED.  I have a job to do and if I have learned nothing else over the last few months, it's this: the passions in my heart deserve my full attention - my kids, my husband, my home and my dreams.  And though it may seem like divided attention, I have learned to give each of them my full attention at the right and proper times... and it has brought me joy and peace.

Secondly, don't be scared of the desires God has put in your heart.  Ask Him for guidance.  Seek godly counsel and most of all, pray.  He will show you the way and make your paths clear.  The only time we struggle is when we go off course.  Psalm 16:11 says "[He] has made known to [you] the path of life; [He] will fill [you] with joy in [His] presence, with eternal pleasures at [His] right hand."  Trust in Him in ALL you do and NEVER lean on your own understanding, thoughts and feelings.  He already knows where you're going to end up... and it's ALL good.  Trust Him.  He will ALWAYS make a way out of no way.  Just trust Him and STAY FOCUSED.

Be Blessed in TRUSTING GOD

Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. - Psalm 37:4

P.S. I still use my e-mail often enough that if anyone wants to chat or just say 'hello' I could respond... and I would love that :)

God is Love. Love is Life. Life is in The Word.

Structurally Sound

24 “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. 26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. 27 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”

- Matthew 7:24-27

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I love the above scripture because it can be related to every life situation.  Everyday we make choices and decisions.  Everyday we have to think about what we were are doing, what we plan to do and how we plan to do it.  Everyday we deal with LIFE and all it throws at us.  No one is exempt from the trials, tribulations, ups and downs of life - the poor, the rich, the beautiful, the disabled, the able - EVERYONE is faced with challenges.  What can make life easier, joyful and peaceful is the foundation from which you approach life.

The fact of the matter is regardless of where or how you grew up or were raised, along with who your parents are and what bloodline you belong to, your foundation is structured based on your experiences, lessons, observations, perspective and memories.  Even if we all witnessed an event that was catastrophic and tragic, that does not mean that we will all take away the same feelings and memories from the event because we are all structured and wired differently.  This is how and why four children can grow up in the same household and enter into adulthood with different perspectives on life.

The issue is not about being different or having different perspectives, the issue is whether your perception and how you interpret life is structurally sound.  A person (and their thoughts, feelings, perspectives etc.) can only be as strong (or sound) as their foundation.  Therefore, if you are standing/moving through life on a faulty, distorted, corrupted foundation, your choices, decisions and perception of life will reflect that.  This is one of the main reasons relationships can be so complicated.  When you put two people together with their own unique experiences, perspectives, opinions etc., you are bound to have disagreements and/or conflict.  However, what is important to understand is that the differences are not the issues, it is the foundation.  And more times than not, when you are faced with a difficult person/situation, it is not the person/situation that is creating the issue, it is the foundation.  (For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. - Ephesians 6:12 KJV)

For example, you and a friend are at the mall and you see a mother struggling with a child who is throwing a temper tantrum.  Immediately, your friend begins to judge the situation and making comments like 'that child is out of control.... what a bad mother... that is so embarrassing... I would never stand for that etc.'  Where as, you look at the situation and feel empathy because, based on your experiences, you can see that the child has special needs and what appears to be a temper tantrum is actually a symptom of her condition.  Is you friend wrong for her reaction?  Do you judge her for stating what seemed to be the obvious?  Or do you recognize that you just have different foundations/experiences to fuel your thoughts and feelings?  Do you hold it against her?

Another example, you're in a relationship and you feel that your partner is not spending enough time with you.  He/she is always working and then he/she is always sleeping.  You're starting to feel that maybe they are not the one for you.  You are feeling unwanted, rejected and ignored.  You try to explain your feelings but their response is not to your liking so you start pulling away from the relationship.  Is this a communication issue?  Maybe in part, but realistically (and more than likely) it's a foundation issue.  For you to automatically co-relate your partners busyness to their feelings towards you and the relationship shows that you have some root issues of self-worth and a distorted perception (ie. maybe you saw your dad do the same thing to your mom and your mom always complained about it and was never happy.  It turned out you dad was actually cheating on your mom and now that's a crack you have embedded in your foundation.)  On the flip side, your partner is possibly working so hard because they grew up in a household where there was never enough money and they vowed to never live like that again.  Their working hard is a genuine desire to provide for you, not neglect you.  (It always helps, especially with 'matters of the heart', to question your thoughts and motives... put your hurt and anger aside and ask yourself 'why' you are thinking or feeling that way.  What are you basing your feelings on?  A past relationship?  A movie?  Are you being rational/realistic?  Why or why not?  It can help to get a better understanding of yourself.)

Being structurally sound begins with being rooted and grounded in love (1 Corinthians 13:4-8, Ephesians 3:17) and the Word so that when the winds, rain and storm comes, your foundation does not crumble under the pressure.  There is strength and integrity in a structurally sound foundation.  It can be trusted, depended on, there is peace, no fear and anxiety, just LIFE in having a structurally sound foundation.  But you have to dig deep.  You ALWAYS have to dig deep to create a strong foundation.  Dig out all the dirt, rocks, debris, trash and junk hiding down there and fill it with the unshakable, immovable, unwavering, unfailing concrete faith of the Holy Spirit.  It will give you peace of mind, joy, love and laughter because Jesus is the Rock on which you should stand, ALL else is sinking sand.

Be Blessed in STANDING ON A STRUCTURALLY SOUND FOUNDATION

7 For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (of cowardice, of craven and cringing and fawning fear), but [He has given us a spirit] of power and of love and of calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control. (2 Timothy 1:7 AMP)

I RESOLVE

I've made up my mind...

As we approach the midway point of the 2012 calender year, I felt it necessary to prompt a reassessment of any goals, resolutions and/or aspirations that were made at the beginning of the year.  We have a tendency to get busy with life or get too tired when challenges arise which normally forces us to put any positive changes we'd like to make on hold.  Well, I'm here to remind and rejuvenate any of those resolutions so that you can make the latter part of the year better than the former.  Here we go...

I Resolve....

I will make positive changes to my personality/character: This resolution is normally the hardest because we don't like to look within ourselves... people do that enough for us.  Because the world is so judgmental it is often increasingly difficult to then judge ourselves.  But I encourage you to do it, if necessary.  If you are willing to take a healthy critical eye to yourself and resolve to make positive changes, you'll be a better person for it.  I personally have been working on the manner in which I talk to people.  I struggle with tone and volume, especially when I'm excited and/or upset, and as I step into a new season of my life, I have resolved to make changes as I want to be known for the CONTENT that comes out of my mouth, not HOW it comes out of my mouth.  Also, I have resolved to not let how I feel determine my day.  Even if I'm tried or frustrated, I have resolved to be at peace and joyful.

I will forgive and let it go:  This is a VERY important one because any relationship that you are invested in, whether it is with family, friends or a partner, leaves you open to getting hurt or disappointed.  It is inevitable.  Similarly to how it is inevitable that you will also hurt and disappoint others.  No one is perfect and we ALL make mistakes.  As hard as we try to be the best we can be, we have to acknowledge that our best isn't necessarily the same 'best' that your friend, family or partner sees... and vice versa.  We have to treat people as we want to be treated, 'judge' people by the same standard we 'judge' ourselves and believe the best in others.  Its easy to be critical and begrudging to others... but how do you like it when people do it to you?

I will Live on Purpose:  Bishop T.D. Jakes has a phenomenal CD/DVD teaching resource available on his website www.tdjakes.org that encourages you to do just that: Live on Purpose.  To wake up everyday like you mean it.  To deal with people everyday like Jesus is coming by nightfall.  Live you life depends solely on your goals, dreams and aspirations.  Challenges will arise, road blocks will form and doubts will surface... but don't give up.  Focus on what you have been called to do (that nagging that remains consistent in your heart) and keep moving forward.  

I will seek His Kingdom FIRST(and His Righteousness)... and ALL good things will be added unto me (Matthew 6:33): I used to struggle with this scripture as I didn't quite understand where His Kingdom was.  My inexperience (and ignorance) had me looking for the Kingdom in the physical realm and brought me to a place of resentment and dissatisfaction with the church and other 'religious' entities.  I couldn't feel the connection.  I finally came to understand, by God's grace and wisdom, that the Kingdom is in me and if I want to reach my full potential and purpose in life, I had to start there.  In essence, seeking the Kingdom and His Righteousness means striving to be Christ-like, standing on His Word, trusting in Him completely and being a reflection of His joy, peace, mercy, forgiveness, grace and love.  This is what it means to seek the Kingdom.  And through striving and accomplishing such Righteousness, it will then shine through in everything you do... how you interact with your family, your friends, co-workers, neighbours, ENEMIES, in your business, your dreams and aspirations.  This is the foundation of 'all the good things' that will be added unto you.  Therefore, if you feel that you are not receiving, enjoying or obtaining 'all the good things', reassess who, what and how you are 'seeking the Kingdom' and whether you are willing to make the necessary changes IN YOU.

Living a life for Christ is a steadfast business.  It is not easy... unless you are willing to let go of yourself and the world.  It is only difficult when you make it difficult by trying to live in both worlds... being a Christian but harbouring unforgiveness, wanting to get but rarely giving, wanting love but not receiving love from the Creator.  We have to resolve to do better because we know better.  

Be Blessed TO DO BETTER

THE BEATITUDES

 

Blessed are the poor in spirit, 

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 

Blessed are they who mourn, 

for they shall be comforted. 

Blessed are the meek, 

for they shall inherit the earth. 

Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness, 

for they shall be satisfied. 

Blessed are the merciful, 

for they shall obtain mercy. 

Blessed are the pure of heart, 

for they shall see God. 

Blessed are the peacemakers, 

for they shall be called children of God. 

Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, 

for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

- Matthew 5:3-10

Bigger than You

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

- Romans 8:28

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I hope that every one had a great Mother's Day and/or made every Mother around you feel special yesterday but I have to be honest... I purposely sent his e-mail out 'late' because I wanted to make a point.  Although it is nice to have special days to celebrate Mother's, Father's, love, giving etc. etc. etc. we should be careful not to let those days define us.  Whether we have specified days, holidays or not should not determine how we feel about ourselves or how we act towards others.  Love, giving and making other's feel special should not be limited to a day.  Similarly, loving, giving and feeling special within shouldn't be limited to a day.

I find that sometimes people get 'caught up' in the day and make it another point of contention or bitterness towards their significant others, their children, friends and family because they either didn't acknowledge the day or do what would have been satisfying.  But I'm here to set the record straight... BEING LOVED, GIVING AND BEING LOVING IS BIGGER THAN YOU.  I would almost go as far as to say that getting so caught up with the day to even see that means that you have completely missed the essence of life and are bordering on being self-centered.  

Jesus wasn't born so that we could celebrate Christmas.  He was born because it was His purpose on Earth.  Jesus didn't die so we could have Easter and a couple days off of work.  He was tortured, endured much and died so that we might live.  We don't have children so that when Mother's Day comes around we can be showered with gifts and feel special.  We should feel special everyday and feel honoured EVERYDAY that God chose us to bring this particular person into the world for His purpose (I'm personally still working on embracing these feelings).  We don't get married so everyone can 'goo goo and ga ga' over us or so that our husband's can (hopefully) remember the day, spoil us and give us gifts to show off at work.  And whether you want to believe me or not, our birthday's are much to be celebrated and remembered but not so much that we can throw parties and spend ridiculous amounts of money just to commemorate the day, but rather to thank God for taking us through another year and asking how we can do better next year and WHAT we can do to make it a better year for ourselves and those around us.  Life is bigger that what we can get - physically, emotionally and mentally - from others.  It's all bigger than that.

We have a purpose on this earth and I'm personally working on the fact that my purpose is bigger than the face that I see in the mirror everyday.  I'm a wife, a mother, a child, a friend, a cousin and an auntie.  My purpose on this earth far exceeds those roles because they don't define me.  My purpose on earth defines me.  I'm writing this to those who may have felt a bit disappointed this Mother's Day for whatever the reason - children are acting crazy, didn't get any gifts, lost a child, didn't do anything special or don't have any much wanted children to celebrate.  It's bigger than you  To the childless-Mother - whether you have a child of your own or not does not define you.  The love you give to those around you, big and small, is what defines you.  Children of God have been adopted into His family.  Giving birth is a privilege and a blessing but (I believe) loving and nurturing someone who you didn't give birth to is greater.  To the neglected Mother - 'neglect' is defined by you.  If you allow what others don't do for you create feelings of neglect, it's because you allowed it.  Do something for others.  Do something for yourself.  Either way, it's bigger than you.  And last, but not least, to the single Mother's - having a husband does not define you and should not make make Mother's Day feel 'more' special because there are plenty of wives out there that may have had the same type of day that you did.  My point is this... don't let society, your family, your partner or even your thoughts define you.  LIFE IS BIGGER THAN YOU.

Find your purpose and focus on that.  If your purpose is to raise children, then do it to the best of your ability, whether they act right or not.  If your purpose is not to raise your own children, find a child that needs mentoring, love and 'raise' them.  If your purpose is to speak life into those who have lost hope, then put your cares aside and reach out to those in need.  God will take care of you.  Let's not be so self-centered... always wondering and pining over what others can do for us.  Our purpose is bigger.  Our lives have been given to us to do more, to be bigger than the face we see in the mirror.  Make the decision to be bigger than YOU.   

Be Blessed in FINDING YOUR PURPOSE

He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. - Proverbs 17:9

11 In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, 12 so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. - Ephesians 1:11-12 

Are you kidding me?

Moreover [let us also be full of joy now!] let us exult and triumph in our troubles and rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that pressure and affliction and hardship produce patient and unswerving endurance.  ⁴ And endurance (fortitude) develops maturity of character (approved faith and tried integrity). And character [of this sort] produces [the habit of] joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation.

⁵ Such hope never disappoints or deludes or shames us, for God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit Who has been given to us.

Romans 5:3-5 AMP

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I got the above passage one day while I was watching Pastor Joyce Meyer and I decided to look it  up and read it over a few times.  And that was my response to it... "Are you kidding me!?!"  God and I often have those types of conversations because sometimes I feel like God must be kidding when he sends messages to me through people, television shows, movies and even my kids.  And what's worse is that they are ALWAYS convicting my current state or mind set.  In this particular situation, I was being convicted about my mind set.

Often times when we go through our trials and tribulations, it is so much easier to be down, stay somber, wallow in misery and feed into self-pity.  I personally believe it's our way of telling the world we are not happy.    Especially since some people (particularly men) are clueless so, of course, women are famous for this 'act'.  But why?  What's the point really?  Ruining the day, the moments, the weeks... for what?  They [the people around you] probably still won't catch on and even when they do, you've still wasted time.  And what are they supposed to do about it?  Fix it?  And if they don't... are you going to be sad all of your life?  Further, what did you gain from being sad or depressed about the situation?  Insight?  Wisdom?  A solution?  Change?  REAL TALK - Acting in this manner to get your own way is manipulative and shows a lack of maturity mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

The fact of the matter is this... if we choose to enter and go through our trials with grace, "rejoicing in our sufferings", we will be better for it as "pressure and affliction produces patient and unswerving endurance."  Which then "develops maturity of character" and ultimately "[the habit of] joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation".  In other words... TRIBULATION = PATIENCE = EXPERIENCE = HOPE.  This is important because "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."  So, if we give in to our emotions, feelings and flesh before we gain the patience and experience, our hearts will be "sick" with lack of hope, which can then personifies into bitterness, unforgiveness, anger, more depression, anxiety etc. etc.

These are the thoughts of the day, not to convict you (well maybe a little) but to encourage and inspire you (and me) to keep pressing forward.  To use wisdom and stand on faith.  God has a plan and it is greater than our plans, regardless of what we THINK is best for ourselves.  By confronting your tribulations with grace, you are slapping the devil in the face and saying "is that all you got?"  Because you need to know that in the end, you are victorious.   But ONLY if you do it God's way.  Me, of all people, DO NOT like feeling out of control.  And that's what the devil plays on every time in my life.  But really, God just allows chaos to happen so that my stubborn-self will let go of the "control" of the situation (that I never had to begin with) and Let Him do my bidding.  

I remember one time I was talking to my "second" mom and I told her that I need to pray for patience because I don't have any and she said "NO! don't do that!  Do you know what you just asked for???"  Well, I know now.  But it's all good.  I will step over this, through this and on this with grace so I can get the experience and finally hope because I KNOW better days are ahead :)  The heart will only get sick if you allow it too.  Stand on His Word.  Stand by Faith.

Be Blessed in TRIUMPHING OVER YOUR TROUBLES

33 I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.] - John 16:33 AMP

Getting off the Roller-coaster

14If you put sin out of your hand and far away from you and let not evil dwell in your tents;
    15Then can you lift up your face to Him without stain [of sin, and unashamed]; yes, you shall be steadfast and secure; you shall not fear.

  16For you shall forget your misery; you shall remember it as waters that pass away.

Job 11:14-16 AMP

Life is all about choices.  God blessed us with the free will to make how ever many choices we need to make throughout the day and through out our life.  The problem with choices is that, more times than not, they don't only affect us.  They affect everyone around us.  And based on our choices, there will always be a consequence... good or bad.  These are facts.  This doesn't mean that we have to be scared or indecisive about making choices, we just need to pray, trust God, weigh them carefully and try our best to make the choices that is best for all of those involved.

I think the biggest difficulty with making choices is sticking to them.  Especially when the ripple effect can be overwhelming.  And then, you may be required to make another choice.  But the key is that whatever choice (or re-choice) you choose, you have to stick with it.  It can be exhausting to you and those around you if your choices become a roller-coaster - one minute you're up, the next minute you're down.  One minute you're in, the next minute you're out.  It's hard, I know to 'stick to your guns', especially when it comes to family and matters of the heart.  But either way, it has to be done.

I was watching a Bishop T.D. Jakes sermon on day entitled "Sleeping Giants" and he made a point - "stability is a ministry".  When we see the word "ministry" we have a tendency to think of church, events, sermons etc. but in fact, whatever it is that you have been blessed to do can be considered a ministry ie. blessing the less fortunate, writing books, counselling, preaching, photography, motivational speaking, cooking etc.  But it has to be stable.  Your family doesn't need you here one minute and gone the next, your children don't need you supportive one minute then condescending the next, your spouse doesn't need you committed one minute then uncommitted the next, your job doesn't need you productive one minute then unproductive the next.  God doesn't need you trusting him one minute then depending on yourself the next.  Stability is a ministry.

Life is already frantic enough to continually be adding more dips and hills.  Stability in and of itself can bring peace to your day.  Being never-changing, regardless of the circumstances.  It's challenging, I know, because life can come at you fast, in many different directions ALL at once.  But my point is, if you make the choice beforehand, and stick to it once the choice is challenged, I believe that it will eventually eliminate the exaggerated stress, anxiety and panic because you are remaining steadfast.  Think about it, if your choices are made based on everything going on around you, what control do you have?  The only person in life you can control in life is yourself.  And if you give that away, what do you have?  A roller-coaster of emotions, panic attacks, joy, misery, peace and chaos.  It's time to tell yourself "I'm too grown to be riding this ride."  Stability is a ministry.  It's time to start ministering to yourself.  Restoring your soul.  Embracing peace.  And I will be doing the same.

Be Blessed in GETTING OFF THE ROLLER-COASTER

 

Read JOSHUA 23

5The Lord your God will thrust them out from before you and drive them out of your sight, and you shall possess their land, as the Lord your God promised you. 6 So be very courageous and steadfast to keep and do all that is written in the Book of the Law of Moses, turning not aside from it to the right hand or the left, 7 That you may not mix with these nations that remain among you, or make mention of the names of their gods or swear by them or serve them or bow down to them. 8 But cling to the Lord your God as you have done to this day. 9 For the Lord has driven out from before you great and strong nations; and as for you, no man has been able to withstand you to this day. 10 One man of you shall put to flight a thousand, for it is the Lord your God Who fights for you, as He promised you. - Joshua 23:5-10 AMP

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Do you have what it takes?

David said to the Philistine, “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. 46 This day the LORD will deliver you into my hands, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head. This very day I will give the carcasses of the Philistine army to the birds and the wild animals, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel. 47 All those gathered here will know that it is not by sword or spear that the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD’s, and he will give all of you into our hands.”

1 Samuel 17:45-47

What is standing between you and your destiny?  You and your purpose?  You and 'the good life'?  I used the story of David vs. Goliath in the opening verse because out of the all the prophets, disciples and heroes in the Bible, to me, David was the most courageous, determined and passionate.  Prior to his encounter with Goliath, he was told that he would be king.  In the midst of the field as he tended to sheep, David was told by a prophet that he would be king.  Imagine that.  He was anointed to do something that most people would scandal, plot ans kill to do.  But David was anointed.  And we all know that he made it regardless of his circumstances.  King David was a man after God's own heart.  Through his battles, confrontations, jealousy, trials and tribulations, David was anointed to be King and he died a King.

So, I ask you again... do you have what it takes?  All of us have a destiny burning inside of us but few of us will bring it to fruition.  The bible says "For many are called (invited and summoned), but few are chosen" (Matthew 22:14 AMP) meaning that we all have it in us to be great.  But 'greatness' is rarely handed to us, or acknowledged, without adverse circumstances and/or a fight.  If you take the time to study the heroes of the bible, such as David, Daniel, Paul, Mary and (of course) Jesus, none of them reached their destiny without trials, tribulation and public rebuke.  They had to endure to overcome.  They knew their purpose was in Christ, they had a message to deliver or an action to perform to complete their destiny, and by knowing that they had to be determined against all odds.  They had to have drive.

When necessary, most of us will dig deep and 'do what we have to do'.  But when it comes to what we have been 'called' to do, our drive seems to be put on the back burner.  Why is that?  There are a few different reasons, the main reason being fear.  Something that I am learning, and trying to embrace, is that fact that the devil fights you the hardest when you have a great destiny.  The devil knows that once he starts messing with your mind, your circumstances, your relationships, your money and your security... fear will kick in.  And everything you have planned, dreamed about, envisioned and worked so hard for gets put aside.  And that's what he wants.  The key is to push past the feelings of fear, inadequacy, anxiety and doubt. ALL the 'greats' in the bible had trials and tribulations and none of the 'greats' travelled an easy road.  The world has us convinced that in order to have anything we want in life, it should be handed to us.  And if we have to fight for it, we're not supposed to have it.  But the truth is that the 'fight' isn't really a fight at all because the battle is already won.  The 'fight' is really a test to see if we have what it takes.  David knew that he was supposed to be king and through it all he never handed his crown over, he never forfeited his throne, he never threw in the towel.  Jesus knew what he was BORN to do.  And though he had to endure the worst of the worst, even though he might have preferred not to be beaten, tortured and murdered, he knew his destiny.

Do you have what it takes?  What is the devil using to try and get you to abort your destiny?  What is he using to try and make you feel that you will never be great?  Is it your health?  You finances?  Your children?  Your marriage?  Your circumstances?  What is he using to fool you?  All he's doing is calling your bluff, trying to convince you to fold.  Don't let him lie to you.  Don't believe the hype.  He's taunting you... 'IF you're so blessed, why are you in so much debt?' 'IF you're so anointed, why isn't anyone calling your back?' 'IF you have a purpose, why is your life so messed up?' 'IF you have the ability to speak to your storms, why can't you find peace in your home?'  Well, let me tell you something today, men and women of destiny... BECAUSE YOU DO have what it takes, you tell the devil and all of his "IF'S" to GO TO HELL.  You dig your heels in DEEP throughout the bill collectors, the poor health reports, unemployment, 'crazy' circumstances and doubt and you declare I HAVE A DESTINY!  Stand on His Word. Have no fear.  Throw all your cards on the table and God will take care of the rest.  You DO have what it takes... because God is with you.

Be Blessed in ENDURING THE TEST

31..If God is for us, who can be against us? 37...in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. - Romans 8:31b, 37-39 (READ ROMANS 8:18-39)

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What is TEMPTATION?

Submit your ways to God, resist the devil and he will flee

James 4:7

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I believe temptation is the single ingredient that is added to your life to either keep you from or propel you into your destiny.  Faith, obedience, wisdom and love are necessary to reach your full potential but I believe temptation is the devil's antidote to either make or break you.  If you take the time to think about it, we all have 'things' that cause us to make decisions based on our desires, our feelings and our will.  For example, you could be in a relationship that is going well but then you feel something boiling up in you to wreck havoc over something 'insignificant'.  You are tempted to 'rock the boat' for no other reason but to be right or be heard.  And you know that you should keep your mouth shut or let it go.  But that feeling or desire is overwhelming.  So you give in.  And before you know it, you have wasted valuable time, instigated getting your feelings and your partners feelings hurt and more than likely still didn't get your point across as you would have like.  Another example - you are trying very hard to lose weight and you have been invited to an event and you know that all of your favourite and (fattening) foods will be there.  Of course you're going to go, you wouldn't miss it for the world, but do you indulge yourself and completely sabotage your diet in one night or do you decide to be proactive and eat before you go to the evet or use self control and PLAN to eat only one of your favorites as oppose to all five.

Being proactive when dealing with temptation is one of the only ways to keep yourself from making poor choices and regretting it later.  In any situation, we can 'mess up' and then suffer the consequences.  But, tomorrow is never guaranteed and I believe that part of spiritual and physical maturity is learning to plan to succeed as oppose to accept the fail.  The devil will put every type of temptation in your way to keep you stuck or in a position of dissatisfaction.  Therefore, when you make choices based on temptation KNOWING that whatever is tempting you is playing on your weaknesses, you can not blame the devil or whatever trap you fell into.  You failed to plan, therefore you planned to fail.

I'm going to give a couple more practical examples... for the ladies, you are in a relationship and you know that your anniversary is coming up.  You know Mr. Man is not good at dates, you know that finances might be tight, you may even know that he's not very good at gift giving.  So, with this knowledge, does it make sense to get upset/start a fight/stress yourself out/ruin the day when the anniversary comes and he has confirmed all of your prior knowledge?  You fell into the temptation of letting anger, bitterness and unforgiveness ruin a day/moment that you can NEVER get back.  For the men, you know yourself well enough to know that you 'enjoy' looking at pretty faces and fit bodies.  Now you have a choice... either choose to remain single or train yourself to ONLY 'enjoy' looking at your significant other.  According to the Word, lust in the mind is equivalent to adultery.  One more example for everyone... we all have financial responsibilities.  Again, you have choices.  You can spend your rent/mortgage on a all-inclusive vacation and then stress about it when you return, you can spend your hydro bill money on a pair of shoes and cook over candle light until you have more money to pay the bill off OR you can take care of your responsibilities and wait until you have a surplus to spend your money without any adverse repercussions.

I know my definition of temptation may seem 'simple' and far fetched as temptation is often regarded as BIG, DEVIL-DESIGNED occurences but in reality, temptation is all around us, everyday.  And if we can't handle the small temptations in our mind and everyday life, how are we supposed to handle the big temptations that face us and act as a catalyst for our destruction or success.  It all starts within us.  When Jesus was in the wilderness, the devil tried to play on Jesus' weaknesses to cause him to fail in His mission.  The devil tried to get Jesus to turn rocks into bread because he knew Jesus was physical hungry.  The devil tried to get Jesus to trade in His purpose for things of the world.  But Jesus knew temptation would come and He planned to succeed and He knew exactly what to say when temptation came (Matthew 4:1-11)  Plan to succeed.  Plan to overcome.  Be proactive and stop letting the devil catch you in the same trap over and over and over again.  The desires of the heart will only come to those who can control the desires of their heart.

Be Blessed in RESISTING TEMPTATION

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. - 1 Corinthians 10:13

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. - Matthew 6:13

God is Love. Love is Life. Life is in The Word.

Death to Flesh

You were running well—who stopped you from obeying the truth?

Galatians 5:7 CEB

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Some days I wake up and feel like "Dear God, what you have called us to do is ridiculous.  There is NO way we can follow you and do as Christ did in this world that is so full of corruption, deceit and pain."  And then God reminds me what Jesus had to endure leading up to his death.  Then my rebuttal is "Jesus knew where he was going after, what He had to look forward to AND He knew WHO He was therefore, It made it easier for Him to endure."  Then God asks me "So, I guess you figure it was easy for Him?  Like, sweating blood comes natural?  You have been promised all that My Son has received.  You just need to embrace WHO YOU ARE IN CHRIST."  I usually don't have much to say after that but my mind is often determined to take over and convince me that there is no truth in the Word and His promises and that all God has called me to do is impossible.  The battlefield of the mind continues.

I have been focusing a lot on renewing of the mind, restoring the soul and killing the flesh because it is all that stands between our death, burial and resurrection.  When we succumb to the desires and feelings of our mind and flesh we put ourselves in the position to remain stagnant, unhappy and miserable.  I know it is hard to rise above and see past our current circumstances.  I completely understand.  But I also understand that in order for me to reach my full potential and all God has in store for me, I HAVE to see past it all, which includes the past, and press forward.  Easier said than done.  Sometimes, it is EXTREMELY difficult for me to look past all that is facing me when my circumstances appear hopeless and my vision seems far-fetched.  I can literally FEEL my 'flesh' creeping up inside of me as it has resolved to self-destruct and destroy EVERYTHING I have worked so hard to accomplish.  The simple fact that I am writing this now is waging war against my 'flesh' as my 'flesh' would rather be non-productive, angry, bitter, wallow in self-pity and subject myself to ways that I know will bury me and KEEP me buried.

We will all have our moments of peace and chaos, joy and grief, happiness and anger.  It is natural - "in this life we will have trials and tribulation".  Where this becomes 'mind over matter' is how we CHOOSE to deal with it.  Although comparing myself to Jesus seems soooo ridiculous at times, it is important for me to embrace the concept in order to press forward.  We all have over 'cross' to bear, just as Jesus did.  However, the difference is that Jesus already set the precedent for victory.  In other words, although we will have "trials and tribulation", frustrations, disappointments, chaos, sickness, unrest and discontentment... we should "be of good cheer" - be at peace, grin and bear it, laugh at it, be excited - "because He has overcome the world" - He has died WITH our 'cross', was buried WITH it, left it in hell and rose from the dead FREE and CLEAR.

Because we all have an innate sense of justice - what is fair and unfair, what is right from wrong, what we deserve from what we don't deserve - we tend to 'go to far' in this mentality as we often allow ourselves to wallow in it.  And when we choose to wallow in the injustice around us, we don't give God the chance to bring us through and/or fix it.  Let's bring it back to Jesus - if He chose to stay in the Garden of Gethsemane, sweating blood, calling out to God and begging Him to 'take this cup' from Him, would He have made it to the cross?  The fact of the matter is this... there is NOTHING that we are asked to endure that Jesus has not already taken on and buried for us.  It is our choice to resurrect ourselves without holding onto what was lost, could have been, should have been and what WE THINK should be.

This is as much a Word for me as it is for most of you.    The battlefield of the mind continues as the 'flesh' is waging war against all that God has promised me.  The devil is determined to test my faith and cause me to doubt God's promises.  BUT the Word is and will forever have the last word.  The battles is already won.  I continue to challenge myself not to be like the Israelite's - grumbling and complaining about everything that seems to be going wrong as oppose to thanking God for blessing me with everything that is going well.  God is in control of all things and His timing is perfect.  BUT if we remain stuck, feeling wronged and/or shafted in our circumstances, it is probably because our 'flesh'/mind has us convinced that we are Israelite's (taking 40 years to make a 11 day journey) and that we would be better off being miserable and focusing on all that is not according to OUR plan.

God can change your circumstance with ONE thought... but you will never know what it is if your 'flesh' is ruling you and your mind is cluttered with complaints.  Thank God for getting you out of Egypt (the old you and your old life), thank God for taking you through the Red Sea (giving you grace to get through what seemed impossible), thank God for giving you Manna every morning (for waking you up, giving you a job to go to, providing all your needs).  Let's just thank God for all He has done and BRING DEATH to your fleshy, selfish, dissatisfied, discontented, complaining, nagging, critical, fault-finding, miserable, unruly, depressed self.  And I will be doing the same.   

Be Blessed in RESURRECTING OUR SPIRIT

I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.] - John16:33 AMP

God is Love. Love is Life. Life is in The Word.